I DID IT AND BOUGHT THEM AND THEYRE ALL MINE AND I JUST SAID FUCK YOU BANK ACCOUNT AND TOOK THE PLUNGE AND NOW I CAN DIE HAPPY UNTIL I FIND SOMETHING ELSE I WANT BUT DONT NEED. WAY OF LIFE,

DUH.




if you need me i'll be lurking by my mailbox for 4-6 business days.

love of my life

i need to own these or i might actually cease to exist.

i have been lusting for 2 or 3 years now and theyre available again and

holy shiiiiiit i just need to own these.

as soon as i can kiss $400 something dollars away, they shall be mine.

lols ain't dead

i remember having to watch this in school after we read the book when i was 12 or something and the lols that followed this scene.

serious acting skillz!!

somethin' strange, in the neighborhood

somethin' weird and it don't look good!

wild thing, you make my heart sing..

...kind of.

just finished watching the new and almighty live-action...

mixed feelings, guys. avoiding my in-depth, amazingly epic ~movie reviewer and critic~ essay, let's just say i thought it was good for what it ended up being.

and now, 100 liters of beer on the wall.... ?? let the wild rumpus start!

holy fuck.

just saw this wall, think i drooled on myself...
click it for the full, drool-worthy effect

feeling very unproductive and bored

want to paint my room, wish it wasn't the biggest, most daunting task of the century

going to go force productivity out of myself now! EYEYEYEYEOW!

so last night i stepped on a rusty nail. i just wanted to say that, because i mean.. i barely even knew rusty nails were for real.

ANYWAYS i woke up at dawn, probz because rusty nails give you superpowers that make it so you dont need sleep and dont get hungover.

now its all sunny and hot-like, so im gonna spend the whole day sitting poolside, reading a book, loving the sun and discussing important world issues with maggi [processed cheese vs real cheese, and which one is appropriate in different contexts and situations].

anyways it's gonna be kinda hot like, all week.

so get outside! go to the pool! highfive the sun!

it wants to be your friend~!

ps wear sunscreen because duh

pps maggi just made me grilled cheese for breakfast. everyone should have a maggi.

hip to be square

i know that its crazyyy

i know that its nowhere

but theres no denying

that its hip to be square!

....

except its really, really not this time

let's all just talk about n64 and mario kart and how great it is for a moment here, ok?
because it's the best.

when i was growing up we had atari at the lake and nintendo at home, and then shit started getting all crazy and we eventually got a playstation when every other kid and their dog had n64.

as a result of this, i was REALLY GREAT at crash team racing, the crash bandicoot equivalent of mario kart for the playstation, but i would continually make a huge ass of myself at birthday parties because apparently i didn't have the motor skills to get anything better than 8th place in mario kart, maybe 7th if someone's aforementioned dog was playing too. seriously, i still think the design of the n64 controllers BLOW, but anyways.

the shame of being so awful at n64 never fully left me, despite my many wins-by-a-long-shot on the playstation at my own birthday and sleepover parties... but now the year is 2009 and i find out my good pal eco has been holding out on me for months, and she has in her possession an n64 and mario kart! BEHOLD!

i had to see if i was still just as crappy as i always was and GUESS WHAT? I'M TOTALLY NOT. now that i'm all grown up and have adequate uh.. gaming skillz? i can totally play and have a fighting chance! oh to be 22, it is truly so spectacular...

anyways soim totes the best now and can finally put my bad-at-n64 days to rest. super!! the moral of the story is this game just got 903043747 times better now that i dont completely suck at it. lulzzzz.

maybe if i play the playstation one now i will totally blow the whole console up. probz.

OKAY NOW REMINISCE ABOUT HOW SWEET THIS GAME WAS WHEN YOU WERE LIKE, 10 OR 11 OR LIKE 23 FOR ALL YOU OLD FARTS.

"wondrously devastating"

i'm pretty p.o.'d that i wasn't thinking when i made my blog and used some obsolete email address as the login and i just spent ten minutes trying to log in to post until i finally remembered i had the wrong email address. hot DOG!

anyways i wanted to blog about something the other day and now i forget what it was so here's this book i'm reading that my good pal erik lent me and he works at a bookstore and is generally hip and happening, with the exception of his "casual-wear" shoes, now resembling some horrible hybrid between sneakers and sandals, only worse than those gladiator sh-andal bootie WHATEVER things, so he probably knows what he's talking about:

i would tell you how it is but i'm currently only 26 pages in and i dont even think at least 8 of those are real pages.
apparently jonathan franzen dissed oprah when she picked it for her book club though and she got her panties in a knot over it so IT HAS TO BE GOOD, RIGHT? [does anyone even remember a million little pieces? worst. i knew the book was over when he talked about 'a fat otter with a paddle like tail' but failed to come to the conclusion that maybe what he was looking at was, i don't know, maybe A BEAVER.].
the back cover is even full of about a gazillion amazing reviews and franzen is looking quite stoic in his author photo. win?

and why is it so cold that i have to wear sweatpants to bed in the middle of summer and i can't feel my feets? does this mean i will still be able to play on my slip n' slide for my bday in january?!?? i can't wait!~!!!!

you know when some people get way too excited about having kids and end up having a litter?

barf.

photography by christophe gilbert

in other breaking news, urban outfitters is finally making my lifelong dream of becoming a real live pony into a reality!
wow, thanks you guys!!!
uhm. wat.

photos from "The Taunt" are up!
they look awesome!! i'm stoked i got to take part and be creepy!
http://fromthepeoplephoto.blogspot.com/
check it out, they've got all kinds of neat projects currently in the works tooooo

also, it is surprisingly easy to get shaving cream, baby powder, cooking oil and a multitude of other goodies out of your hair after glopping it all in there for a few hours!

speaking of

i know it's old and i know everyone has probably seen it but...
LET'S TALK ABOUT HOW IN LOVE WITH THIS DANCE I AM.
no, seriously, if you don't like it you're probably an asshole and i don't think we can be friends.
so well done! so adorable! myyaaaahh!!!
makes me want to put off sleeping and push all my furniture aside and go to town dancing all night, despite the fact i just worked a twelve hour day and i work again in the morning for another billion hours.

i miss dancing more than most things. won wonn.

magic soap tingles

so... this is my new favorite thing.
this stuff is the best.
no, really, THE BEST.
it's like a whole-mouth-clean for your entire body!!
it makes you all cooly and tingly and amazing
and basically the smallest amount makes so much lather action, which is just great if youre like.. 22 and poor/a stingy cheapskate, you know?
and then it leaves you all smooth feeling!!
im considering calling into work so i can just sit here admiring how smooth my legs are right now.
plus it makes the bathroom smell like you just cleaned it!
i cant even believe how awesome this stuff is you guys.
i never want to do anything but shower ever again.
thank you dr. Bronner and your magical soap that you can use for everything ever!! you're the bomb!
i dunno why i didn't get wise to this stuff a thousand years ago when i first heard about it.
get into it....

tree shapers

um, what? soooo cooool!
what is this, like the most tedious art form ever?
either way, very cool. they make giant stick tree people and tables and stuff too!
here's the website: http://www.pooktre.com/index.html
i want a live tree chair.

inspired by kittens

sundays inspired by sundays:
-brunching

-shopping trips

-tennis-ing

-high class dinners

-arts and crafts

-movies because apparently ive only seen two movies in my entire life

all sundays from now on will include the likes of fooding with friends, tennis leaguing like pros and arts and crafts. maybe throw in some bike rides for good measure?

after todays brunch we went to wal-mart for our art-ing needs and picked up some super sweet etch-a-sketch things, paint by numbers and tennis rackets. this is what we got!

our walls are going to look so sweet now even if we are cripples

i dunno when paint by number got so tech, but whatever
these things take forever!!

we might get them done by like, the end of summer or something

oh also maggi resisted the urge to draw more porno on the magnadoodle for the entire weekend!!
NEW RECORD GUYS.

"Sometimes I can hear my bones straining

under the weight of all the lives I'm not living."

paper girls and paper boys

this is the neatest little project i've seen in awhile.
brilliant!
who wouldn't love to receive a bundle of art while walking down the street?
wish more people were doing small things like this.

Papergirl #3 from Papergirl on Vimeo.

http://www.papergirl-berlin.de/

before maggo burnt her scalp right off, she jerked it with the head tingler.
which is the best invention ever, in case anyone didn't know.

seriously, it would eliminate all need for relationships, almost.


LOOK. it equals instant relaxation!

so maggi set herself on fire, which was horrendous.
then she did it again an hour later.
dear maggi, i know you want to be a fiery redhead but just get real already.
burnt hair smells worse than week old garbage.
won wonnnn.
this was entertaining for fives minutes.

i don't understand how to operate the internet.
i have two days off, also, sort of. the possibilities!

conversations:

l: did you know...
k: that your head is the size of a grape
l: that mom named you kristen because she wanted you to be a ten and not a tine?
k: and mine is the size of a pretty good strawberry. yes i know.
l: [unimpressed face]
k: it's because she thought i was a perfect ten, not something goats eat. tin. direct quote. i'm not even fucking with you.
....
k: dad named you leanne because he was really really high.
l: shut up.

--------------------------------------

r: what kind of sandwich did you get?
k: veggie sandwich... with ham.

anyways, here's some sloths in a box.
mawwwww.

i don't see why not?

floor to ceiling bookshelves.

want.

now.

think beauty and the beast.

"If there is no love in the world, we will make a new world, and we will give it walls, and we will furnish it with soft, red interiors, from the inside out, and give it a knocker that resonates like a diamond falling to a jeweller's felt so that we should never hear it. Love me, because love doesn't exist, and I have tried everything that does."

the only things my life currently consists of.

ungggh. now!!

ten thousand miles a millisecond

just a little clip of some underwater life to blow your mind. wild!

ps: the website this is from is amazing. thanks chris, for showing it to me!

you know youre doing something right in life when shit hits the fan and all you want to do is puke because you realize how incredible and messy and beautiful life is.

"To me, every hour of the day and night is an unspeakably perfect miracle."
-Walt Whitman

spring in my step
spring in my bones
shake it up shake it up
!!

"Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was moving his hand from his thigh to my chest but on the way he sort of squeezed my stomach. When I asked him why he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under my roll.""

http://www.fmylife.com

its really hard to make sweet collages when you have no paper and no glue. maaaaan. just so everyone knows, twentyfour hour walmarts arent open for twentyfour hours on sundays so all safaris are destined for epic fail status.